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my doubts fade away

If you ever find yourself stuck in the middle of the sea, I'll sail the world to find you

Sunday, August 16, 2009 @ 10:56 PM


"But how I am on stage is exactly who I am, how I living my life is exactly the way I had envisioned it to be" - Lady GaGa

i really kudos her talent in music. she daring-ness and all just gave me a sense of honesty.. like.. its just her... whatever that she wears, its just her her and not anyone else.. dont really care what does others really think..

i wonder when will i ever be like that..

i always want to be someone that doesnt give two hoots about ppl who are always trying to get me down. whether is it through their constant criticism or their own insecurities, i always tell myself to just ignore them. but i have to confess, i aint that strong. i still pretty much care about what ppl say and think about me.. sometimes i behave the way i behave not becos i want to, but more like i have to.. and its not easy.. there are times in my life i wonder "who am i?" "who is this girl that is staring back at me in the mirror?" "do i know her?" but i thank God that i dont struggle with that question for too long.. becos i know, i am always a daughter of christ.. that even if i die without the world knowing who tan yan bing is, its alright.. as long as God remembers me and remember to bring me to heaven, its all alright. hahahas.

from that one sentence from Lady GaGa, i began to learnt the power of imagination! the fourth dimension that pastor yonggi cho writes about.. its not just a christian thing, but its just a very real life thing.. the difference is that when you are a christian, God can empower you to complete it.. what do you envision yourself to be? a top CEO running a business? the top banker? if you can see it, you can have it! why is having a great vision so important? becos when u have a vision, you will mould your life according to that vision. i have a vision of gg to NTU.. that explains why i study this hard for my tests, exams and chiong for projects. there are alot of ppl around me that study for the sake of studying (no offence really.), from them, you will often see their lack of energy and commitment in project work and even in their own work. that simply becos, they lack a vision for their studies. WHY do u wanna get that diploma? WHY do you want that degree? just a paper to put inside your resume? i wanna be a successful business woman next time when i grow up. i know degree doesnt necessarily mean i will be successful.. but at least its a good starting point and something i can fall back on if i decided business is not my type.. at least i have a degree and can work somewhere, be a director or something.. i love the energy that ooze out from business.. maybe it runs in my family DNA.. but i simply love business.. thats my vision and i am glad i am working towards it..

enough said. i am starting to study for friday -media relations! NTU 2010!